those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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