If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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