There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
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he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
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