Michael Bay diarrhea
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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