I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
