It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
