his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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