the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
