We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
