"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
im six kinds of drunk right now
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Shame - the story of my life.
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