i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
