Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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