ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
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He felt like a one man threesome
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
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Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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