just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
