going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
