ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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