his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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