I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
