good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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