Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Michael Bay diarrhea
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
