don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I love you. Go after that dick
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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