we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize