i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Randomize
