He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
