me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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