i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
