i can't believe i had my finger in that
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
