I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
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Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
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Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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