ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
