And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
