my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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