i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
