i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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