hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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