Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Randomize
