wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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