how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
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