Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize