Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
if only i could text you this smell
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Dear god my vagina.
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