if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
