Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
