More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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