i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize