suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Randomize
