Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
