How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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