i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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