you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
That was before I lit my hair on fire
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
