Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
jump out the window naked night went bad
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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