I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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