wakey wakey hands off snakey
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize